Traditional parenting techniques rely on behavior-focused strategies, like rewards and punishments. Sometimes these can result in a behavior change, but many times these short term fixes have long term relationship consequences. Nothing is more important than relationship, yet most parenting information is myopic and seeks simply to make a behavior go away without looking at the bigger picture.

Every relationship is going to have disconnections that result from either focusing on behaviors, that surface when our own issues as parents get in the way, or when things are further complicated by traumatic experiences for either the parent or the child. How do we repair those relationships? How do we go from not wanting to be with our child because of their behaviors to creating a loving connection? How can we support parents in making this paradigm shift in their relationships?

This class will explore the:

I. Foundation of Relationships, including attachment status, affect regulation, trauma, and brain states.

II. Building and Maintenance of Relationships, including normal development across ages and stages using cutting-edge neuro-science as a guide.

III. Repair of Relationships- Normal cycles of repair, more extensive repair work, beginning with awareness of parent, interpretations of behavior, meta-communication, understanding feedback loops, how to connect through difficult behaviors, creating a coherent narrative (parent and child), helping parent connect to own internal guidance, integration of parent's own traumas, and integration of the child's traumas.