Coming soon- Parenting Well Using Your Intuition ebook.

Excerpt- “Anyone can become angry. That is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose and in the right way- that is not easy.”-Aristotle

When you are feeling emotional upset within yourself, acknowledge the emotion and shift the feeling before you interact with your child. We all feel anger and frustration at times, but just as we teach our children not to take out their frustrations on things, animals, or people; neither should we. As parents, many of us are guilty of reacting in the moment based on how we feel. If we are angry or upset with a spouse, friend, family member or a business associate, it can lead to our propensity to yell at our kids or take out our frustration on them in some way which leads to a disconnection with our child. My mom gave me advice many years ago to always stop and count to 10 before I responded to one of my kids, which sounded great in theory, but often the emotion comes on so strongly and the thought of counting to 10 doesn’t even enter my mind.

Needless to say, my mom probably repeated those words 10 or 15 times before I got it…. The point is it takes practice, but a good way to shift out of a moment of frustration or anger with your child is to become aware of what your body feels like or what thoughts are in your head before you respond to your child. Some people call this shifting your energy or shifting your personal reactive style before engaging with your child. It does take practice and the first few times you may respond with the old pattern, but its okay! Parenting is an evolutionary process and the key to transforming anything is to first bring awareness to it. It’s only when you are aware of a change needing to take place that you can then do something to transform it. We model the behavior we want our children to have and I am sure we’ve all had to correct our child and teach them not to take out their frustrations on other children, siblings, animals or toys. We need to be conscious of the fact that our children watch how we react to things and model what they see. If you as a parent choose to focus on any new shift for the New Year, I would highly recommend this one, because the impact on ourselves and our children is too great to be ignored. There is good news however. If we find ourselves responding to our child from a place of anger or upset, we can reconnect by acknowledging what happened; accept how your child may feel and what feelings come up for you; and apologize. We are all humans and we make mistakes….

© by Tara Paterson, All Rights Reserved. To pre-order your copy, send $19.95 to paypal, click on send money option using formom@justformom.com. (**if you have registered for one of the teleclasses, your ebook is included in the price of admission.)